Now If I May Indulge In A Bit Of Personal History, A Few Years Ago I Worked For A While At The Los Alamos Scientific Laboratory In New Mexico. I Had A Job There As A Spy. No, I Guess You Know That The Staff Out There At That Time Was Composed Almost Exclusively Of Spies...of One Persuasion Or Another. And, While I Was Out There, I Came To Realize How Much The Wild West Had Changed Since The Good Old Days Of Wyatt Earp And Home On The Range, And Here Then Is A Modern Cowboy Ballad Commemorating That Delightful Metamorphosis Called The Wild West Is Where I Wanna Be.



Along The Trail You'll Find Me Lopin'

Where The Spaces Are Wide Open,

In The Land Of The Old A.E.C.* Yee-hoo!

Where The Scenery's Attractive,

And The Air Is Radioactive,

Oh, The Wild West Is Where I Wanna Be.



'Mid The Sagebrush And The Cactus

I'll Watch The Fellows Practice

Droppin' Bombs Through The Clean Desert Breeze. A-ha!

I'll Have On My Sombrero,

And Of Course I'll Wear A Pair O'

Levis Over My Lead B.V.D.'s.**



I Will Leave The City's Rush,

Leave The Fancy And The Plush,

Leave The Snow And Leave The Slush

And The Crowds.

I Will Seek The Desert's Hush,

Where The Scenery Is Lush,

How I Long To See The Mush-room Clouds.



'Mid The Yuccas And The Thistles

I'll Watch The Guided Missiles,

While The Old F.B.I. Watches Me. Yee-hoo!

Yes, I'll Soon Make My Appearance

(Soon As I Can Get My Clearance),

'Cause The Wild West Is Where I Wanna Be.