Gary-Owens-Voice (GOV) Guy Comes Onscreen, Whipping Out His Lower-case "i" From A Briefcase And He Has A Dialogue With A Rude Off-screen Voice (ROV):

GOV: Hi-ho Everyone, I Bet You Don't Know What This Is.

ROV: It Looks Like A Small L With A Ball On Top.

GOV: Well, Golly-gee, I Never Thought Of It, But It Does Look Something Like An L With A Ball On Top.

ROV: Not Something Like, Exactly Like! You Have The Mind Of A Flea!

GOV: Quiet Down Now. This Is The Letter I. Many Words Start With The Letter I.

ROV: (rudely Mocking Him) "Many Words Start With The Letter I!"

GOV: And The One That Springs To My Mind Is -- "Impolite." Now We Don't Want To Be Impolite. (pause.) That Means Being Rude, Or Discourteous, Or Having No Manners.

ROV: (smart-alecky): Tell Us All About It, Bright Boy!

GOV: Excuse Me. (He Walks Off-stage; There Comes Several Seconds Of A Loud Scuffle, The Suitcase Bounces Around. The GOV Guy Returns.) Try Not To Be Impolite. And Thank You For Your Time.