(Opening Theme):



They Say I Might As Well Face The Truth.

That I'm Just Too Long In The Tooth.

Oh I'm An O.A.P. And Weak-kneed

But I Have Not Yet Quite Gone To Seed.



I May Be Over The Hill Now That I Have Retired.

Fading Away But I'm Not Yet Expired.

Clapped Out, Rundown, Too Old To Save

One Foot In The Grave.



(Closing Theme):



They Say I Might As Well Face The Truth.

That I'm Just Too Long In The Tooth.

I've Started To Deteriorate

And Now I've Passed My Own Sell-by Date.



Oh I Am No Spring Chicken It's True.

I Have To Pop My Teeth In To Chew.

And My Old Knees Have Started To Knock.

I've Just Got Too Many Miles On The Clock.



So I'm A Wrinkly, Crinkly, Set In My Ways.

It's True My Body As Seen Better Days.

But Give Me Half A Chance And I Can Still Misbehave.

One Foot In The Grave.

One Foot In The Grave.

One Foot In The Grave.