The Day I Came To Hollywood,
I Got Off The Bus, Just Me An' My Guitar.
My Hair Was All Jacked-up For Jesus,
It Got Real Quiet When I Walked In That Bar.
Some Mean Old Guy Just Walked On By,
With A Devil Tattoo And An' Erring In His Nose.
Well, I Tried To Introduce Myself,
But No-one Took The Time To Say Hello.

So I Pulled Out My Guitar,
An' I Launched Into A Dolly Parton Song.
An' Before I Knew It,
Coats Of Many Colors Began To Sing Along.
And It Wasn't One Of Them Lyin', Cryin', Cheatin', Dyin',
Somebody-done-somebody-wrong Songs.
It Was An Absolutely Finger Lickin', Grits & Chicken,
Country Music Love Song.

Now I Realised This City Life,
Musta Taken A Toll On All Them Lonesome Souls.
An' I Couldn't Help Wonder What Would Make A Guy,
Wanna Wear Women's Clothes.
When Finally, A Real Man Sat Next To Me,
An' Ordered A Tequila.
Well, He Turned An' Smiled An' Shook My Hand,
An' Said: "Hi There, My Name Is Sheila."

He Said: "I Heard You From Across The Room.
"Is That What They Call A Mountain Music Song?"
He Said: "I Must Admit, I Laughed At First,
"Then I Found Myself Singin' Along."
And It Wasn't One Of Them Lyin', Cryin', Cheatin', Dyin',
Somebody-done-somebody-wrong Songs.
It Was An Absolutely Finger Lickin', Grits & Chicken,
Country Music Love Song.

Well, I Had A Fall, I Liked Them All,
But I Could Never Call This Place My Home.
An' As My Bus Rode Past That Bar,
I Swore I Could Hear 'em Singin' On.

And It Wasn't One Of Them Lyin', Cryin', Cheatin', Dyin',
Somebody-done-somebody-wrong Songs.
It Was An Absolutely Finger Lickin', Grits & Chicken,
Country Music Love Song.
It Was.