DR. SCOTT:
From The Day He Was Born
He Was Trouble
He Was The Thorn
In His Mother's Side
She Tried In Vain

CRIMINOLOGIST:
But He Never Caused Her Nothing But Shame

DR. SCOTT:
He Left Home The Day She Died!

From The Day She Was Gone
All He Wanted
Was Rock & Roll Porn
And A Motor Bike
Shooting Up Junk
He Was A Lowdown Cheap Little Punk
Taking Everone For A Ride

CHORUS:
When Eddie Said He Didn't Like His Teddy
You Knew He Was A No Good Kid
But When He Threatened Your Life
With A Switch Blade Knife

FRANK:
What A Guy!

JANET:
Makes You Cry!

DR. SCOTT:
Und I Did!

COLUMBIA:
Everybody Shoved Him
I Very Nearly Loved Him
I Said "Hey Listen To This"
Stay Sane Inside Insanity
But He Locked The Door And Threw Away The Key!

CHORUS:
When Eddie Said He Didn't Like His Teddy
You Knew He Was A No Good Kid
But When He Threatened Your Life
With A Switch Blade Knife

DR. SCOTT:
But He Must Have Been Drawn
Into Something
Making Him Warn
Me In A Note Which Reads

CHORUS:
What's It Say?
What's It Say?

EDDIE:
I'm Out Of My Head!
Oh, Hurry Or I May Be Dead!
They Musn't Carry Out Their Evil Deeds!

(SCREAM)

FRANK:
What A Guy!

JANET:
Makes You Cry!

DR. SCOTT:
Und I Did!

CHORUS:
When Eddie Said He Didn't Like His Teddy
You Knew He Was A No Good Kid
But When He Threatened Your Life
With A Switch Blade Knife

FRANK:
What A Guy!(whoa, Whoa, Whoa)

JANET:
Makes You Cry! (hey, Hey, Hey)

DR. SCOTT:
Und I Did! (I Did!)