I Wrote This Novel Just For You
It Sounds Pretentious But It's True
I Wrote This Novel Just For You
That's Why It's Vulgar
That's Why It's Blue
And I Say, Thank You
And I Say, Thank You

I Wrote This Novel Just For Mom
For All The Mommy Things She's Done
For All The Times She Showed Me Wrong
For All The Time She Sang God's Song
And I Say Thank You Mom
Hello Mom
Thank You Mom
Hi Mom

I Read A Book About Uncle Tom
Where A Whitey Bastard Made A Bomb
But Now Ebonics Rule Our Song
Those Motherfuckers Got It Wrong
And I Ask
Who Is Uncle Tom?
Who Is Uncle Tom?
Who Is Uncle Tom?
You Are

I Read A Book About The Self
Said I Should Get Expensive Help
Go Fix My Head
Create Some Wealth
Put My Neurosis On The Shelf
But I Don't Care For Myself
I Don't Care For Myself
I Don't Care For Myself
I Don't Care

I Wrote This Novel Just For You
I'm So Pretentious, Yes It's True
I Wrote This Novel Just For You
Just For You
Just For You