I Can Make Anybody Pretty
I Can Make You Believe Any Lie
I Can Make You Pick A Fight
With Somebody Twice
Your Size. . .

Well I've Been Known To Cause A Few Breakups
And I've Been Known To Cause A Few Births
I Can Make You New Friends
Or Get You Fired From Work.

(Chorus)
And Since The Day I Left Milwaukee
Lyncheburg Bourbon, France
Been Makin The Bars
Lots Of Big Money
And Helpin White People Dance
I Got You In Trouble In High School
But College Now That Was A Ball
You Had Some Of The Best Times
You'll Never Remember With Me
Alcohol, Alcohol

I Got Blamed At Your Wedding Reception
For Your Bestman's Embarrassing Speech
And Also For Those Naked Pictures Of You At The Beach
I've Influenced Kings And World Leaders
I Helped Hemingway Write Like He Did
And I`ll Bet You A Drink Or Two That I Can Make You
Put That Lampshade On Your Head . .

(Chorus):
Cause Since The Day I Left Milwaukee
Lyncheburg, Bourbon, France
Been Makin A Fool Out Of Folks
Just Like You
And Helpin White People Dance
I Am Medicine And I Am Poison
I Can Help You Up Or Make You Fall
You Had Some Of The Best Times
You'll Never Remember With Me
Alcohol

And Since The Day I Left Milwaukee
Lyncheburg, Bourbon, France
Been Makin The Bars
Lots Of Big Money
(crowd:) And Helpin White People Dance
Yeah I Got You In Trouble In High School
And College Now That Was A Ball
You Had Some Of The Best Times
You'll Never Remember With Me
Alcohol, Alcohol